


How Nardole Got His Body Back

by Tardiscompanion



Category: Doctor Who (2005)
Genre: Darillium, F/M, Life on Darillium, Missing Scene, Old Fic, short fic
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-05-26
Updated: 2020-05-26
Packaged: 2021-03-02 17:35:08
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 721
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24390655
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Tardiscompanion/pseuds/Tardiscompanion
Summary: River and the Doctor slice of life
Relationships: Twelfth Doctor & Nardole, Twelfth Doctor/River Song
Kudos: 11





	How Nardole Got His Body Back

**Author's Note:**

> teen and up for innuendo

One of the best things about being married to River Song was that she was never jealous. She was definitely more willing to shoot things than the Doctor thought was strictly necessary. But she wasn’t the jealous type.

The Doctor sat on the shoulders of the AI unit that formerly housed the head of King Hydroflax and asked Nardole to pass him the vibrocutters. He was working on a panel in the ceiling, they lived in an adorable little house with inferior wiring and he was fixing that. A virtual chess board beamed out from the center of the mobile life support unit. Nardole handed him the item and started to select the pawn.

“No.” The Doctor interrupted Nardole’s selection.

“No?”

“You’re not developing your defense. It would be better to... Ah-“

The hairs on the back of his neck stood up and he turned just in time to see his wife standing in the doorway. She was supposed to be on a dig on the other side of the planet. He would be thrilled to see her home early if she didn’t throw the ancient weapon she was holding at his head. The Doctor fell backwards just dodging the forked spear that came flying at him. He scrambled to right himself. 

“Hello darling,” he smiled up at her. “You’re home early.” 

She didn’t return his smile and he figured he was in trouble. For what he had no idea, probably something he hadn’t done yet. The weapon that stuck into the wall still reverberated with the force of River’s throw. She was towering over him in a black dress with a neckline that plummeted to her stomach. A braided silver crown adorned her head and a thin silver chain that could easily be used as a garrote followed the curves. Deadly and regal, two of his favorite things rolled into one.

“Hello sweetie, I just thought I’d stop home and drop off the spear of Darillium and pick up my lipstick, you know before I popped off to your wedding.” 

Why-oh-why was he stupid enough to get married while he was supposed to be living in domestic bliss with River? It must be a different Doctor. He didn’t know a thing about ‘the wedding.’ 

“Nardole, would you excuse us for a moment,” River asked, throwing a news orb at the Doctor. The title of the article was ‘Love Rules?’ The article was about the most expensive wedding in the galaxy of Princess Thaia to King Thome. A financial and political alliance? That story was as old as time. Nothing to see here except the main photograph that accompanied the article. King Thome, with his current face was standing at the altar, winking at the camera.

“Ah,” said the Doctor. I think I see the problem, this is a common face. It’s probably not even me.” 

“It’s you. she replied coldly. Look at the photo on the bottom.” Sitting among the distinguished guests, wearing a slightly startled expression was Nardole in a human looking body.

“That’s interesting.” The Doctor sat down and rubbed his chin. He considered what equipment he might need to transfer Nardole’s head to something a little less bulky. “I can’t say the thought hasn’t crossed my mind.” 

“Fantasize about running off and marrying other women often do you?”

“Your ex-husband’s head is right in the next room! Attached, oh wait, to the body of your other ex-husband!” He wasn’t upset. The queasy tight feeling in his stomach had nothing to with the fact that River brought him a printed proof that however much time they had left on Darillum, eventually it would run out. 

“How many times? River poked him in the chest. I married the diamond.” 

The Doctor grabbed her fingers and brought them to his lips. He didn’t want to fight. River had been away on a dig for two weeks.

“Well, I’m sure I had a very good reason for marrying Princess Thaia. Look at her she’s hideous.” After an archeological dig, River’s palms were rough, but the tops of her fingers were soft. He kissed and brushed his lips against them. She sighed and he pulled her to him. The queasy feeling ebbed at her closeness. “She’s stunning.” River contradicted. He took her face in his hands and slid his lips over hers.


End file.
